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“Inside Out” – A Focusing Speaking Movie

A revolutionary film that teaches us 
a way to be with our teenagers​

Picture
The moment I laid eyes on the trailer of the upcoming Dysney-Pixar movie I knew it was the one for me: a family dinner given a depth dimention, when the different parts – fear, anger etc. – of each participant got centerstage, propelling the interaction between the mother, the father and the daughter.
And indeed, “Inside Out” justified the lengthy anticipation, and even turned out to be much more than I dared to hope for : the mainstream stronghold produced a revolutionary film that dares to ignore several cornerstones in cinema, as well as in our society, and to declare an independent pathway.
Let’s begin by saying that it is probably not a children’s movie. In all of Disney’s movies adults will enjoy additional layers, cultural contexts, humor and depth, sitting next to their children, but unlike other films, “Inside Out” avoids traditional elements of structure and plot which attract children: there is no fight between good and bad (there is no vilain, at all), no chases or battles. Children may find the movie too long, even dull, because the journey that is presented is delicate, complex, filled with details and is directed inside, not only forward. On the other hand, it is funny, sad, colorful and provides wonderful topics for conversation, so you should give it a try.

The movie tells the story of Reilley, an 11-year-old girl, who moves with her parents from Minnesota to San Francisco, a beautiful city rendered a rather gloomy appearance through Reilley’s extinguished eyes. Naturally, as anyone who ever tried relocation knows, the move is hard for Reilley: she left her room, her friends and her hockey team in the snowy Minnesota, and in the new place everything is... well, new. But the real crisis happens on the inside.
“Joy” is in charge in Reilley’s internal space. Gay and jumpy she has been there, since Reilley was born. She enables fooling around and being optimistic, always showing the good and the happy side of things, cheering and bringing ease to every situation. “Joy” is the boss in Reilley’s head, where the emotional headquarters is situated, controlling everything: the memories, all areas of life, thoughts and reactions.

Joy’s greatest challenge is “Sadness”: She is a blue, chubby and gawky character who should be watched out for: she paints everything she touches in blue sadness (which makes her even sadder).
One day, as a result of a bitter quarrel between the two, they find themselves outside of the head, within Reilley’s winding memories and past experiences. Joy leads the way back to headquarters filled with motivation, where, in the meantime, the other emotions are required to take charge, losing it while struggling with Reilley’s daily challenges. Her issues, inside and outside are getting worse and worse. Reilley’s world is crumbling.
The journey of the two is long and filled with obstacles. Joy – who is protecting some of Reilley’s important memories lest they are lost – has to, litterally, drag sadness a significant part of the road.

Sadness ruins everything
It’s true, when I am sad, I am heavy and a drag. My sadness crawls around me, painting whoever is near me in blue colors. We don’t want sadness, it ruins even pleasant sensations and defeats sweet memories, it holds us back, it is onerous and cumbersome.
In one of the best  scenes in the movie, Joy draws a circle on the floor and tells Sadness (amicably but firmly) to stay inside. Sadness agrees, she doesn’t want to ruin things, but quickly enough she leaks outside, painting her surroundings in blue again.

And indeed, this is the way that we, as a society, as individuals and as parents treat sadness. This is the way we were raised, “Big boys don’t cry” or “you’re much prettier whan you smile!”. We attempt to reduce sadness to very specific points, and to leave it there, so it doesn’t take over, so it doesn’t ruin things. So we say: “Look at the bright side” or “Things will work out!” but Sadness, as it usually does, leaks right outside, staining everything, and the more we try to silence and contain it, the more it will burst out.

During the journey, Joy realizes what a significant role Sadness plays, how she drives Reilley’s experiences and how, once she’s been given a place, she’s been the one who has enabled to feel relief, friendship and happiness.
I heard quite a lot of children (and adults too) who said the movie was sad. And no wonder: before the revelation, the journey is grueling and hopeless, and afterwards – Sadness gains a place of honor. She is permitted to paint everything, she is hugged and is allowed to hug. In a world in which the commandment “be happy!” rules, in a world in which sadness is being silenced, hidden, and condemned, like in the greater part of the movie, the message of the movie is completely radical and not easy. So if the movie makes your children sad too, this is a great opportunity to exercise what the movie is offering: can you try not to cheer them up, not to make them happy? Can you  just to be with them in their sadness? listen to it?

Puberty: the collapsing islands of the soul

It is not a coincidence that Reilley, the protagonist of the movie, is at the beginning of puberty – a tempestuous age, filled with ups and downs (even without being uprooted from a familiar surrounding to a new one), in which the islands of the soul collapse and sink in emotional storms.  How easily we parents may be carried away into a whirlpool of our relationship with our adolecents, as the wonderful dinner scene clearly demonstrates. Our concern, our helplessness, our anger, and even other things that preoccupy or bother us – they are all easily triggered confronted with the faces, tone of voice and the words that suddenly come out of our teenagers, coming at us straight from their storm. In a blink of an eye, we can lose it in the discordant dialog with them.
The movie offers different way, by which we can go through the storm with them, until it grows new and more sophisticated islands in the soul, more complex, and  sometimes challenging. A way by which we can become a safe, enabeling space for them to express their feelings, sadness, anger and fear, without us telling them “why are you over-dramatizing everything?” or “relax!”. A place where they can be just as they are, sad, confused and angry, unable to be happy and to get a hug from us that says: we are here with you.

“Inside Out”, Disney Pixar Studios, writer and director: Pete Docter.
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